Like Mother, Like Trash...

Fresh out of rehab (just for the party, y'all - she's not officially out yet), Linday Lohan did what she does best - wear a bikini in a blatant display for the paparazzi. What in the sweet lord's name is going on with those shoes? Anyhoo - I'm sure her 21st birthday party would have been a lot better if there was alcohol, or at the very least some co-caine, involved. Oh well, I've penciled the 'falling off the wagon' to take place on August 5th at the very latest. I hope I'm wrong. I hope it's much, much sooner. You know how we love them broken here at TGG. Dina, I'm looking at you to assist in your daughter's certain relapse so it can happen in a timely fashion. We can't wait around forever. All you need to do is sprinkle some quaaludes onto her birthday cake, the same way that Steve Sanders spiked Brandon's drink on 90210. Then she will have no choice but to say "Fuckit, the damage has been done" and go on a binge the likes of which have never been seen...since the last time she binged. Become Steve Sanders, permed hair and all, Dina. The world is counting on you.

More of the sober lame bash here.